The last word Bob Devlin heard were, "Last call." Then he was blinded by a bright flash.

The next words came through a pounding headache. Gruff words, spoken harshly. "Time to get up, my new husband."

Bob knew he wasn't on his boat because nothing outside his head moved. He shifted off his numb arm and found the bed soft. The smell of coffee tried to sneak past his guard. "Coffee and codeine," said the gruff voice. "And another foggy morning in San Francisco."

Bob eased open one eyelid and saw a bearded man in a purple robe holding a tray filled with coffee and toast. The beard seemed familiar. "Hey," he slurred. "You're the man I met at the bar last night."

The man smiled a wicked smile and set the tray down. "Yes, that's right. But that was a week ago. Don't you remember flying down to San Francisco? Don't you remember the big wedding yesterday and the huge reception last night?"

Bob sighed and breathed in the coffee smell. It smelled like expensive coffee. The good stuff. "But I'm not gay."

The man laughed. "If you're not gay, well then I just don't know who is. Now come on, you butch husband of mine. Rise and shine."

Bob closed his eyes and tried to remember. He had a bad feeling about this. "Hey," he said without opening his eyes. "If this is a week later, that means I missed my birthday."

"He's awake."

Bob heard the door open and a crowd sound enter. He opened his eyes and found the room filing with all his Alaska friends.

"Happy birthday," came from many lips. And, "Boy you look bad," from others.

The bearded man in the robe was laughing. "Boy we had you fooled. You really thought you'd been Shanghaied to San Francisco and married to a man." The man laughed louder.

Bob sat up in bed. His headache was fading. He waited for the laughter to subside. "Hey," he said. "Is that coffee for drinking?"

Someone tossed a present on the bed. The bearded man handed him a cup of coffee. A few friends sat along the edge of the bed. Bob sipped coffee and smiled. "I'm really glad," he said. "That I really didn't lose a week."

The room became suddenly quiet.

"I didn't lose a week? Did I?"